This ridiculously stupid Obama conspiracy will make you bang your head on the wall. You’re welcome.

Miriam Carey, who was shot to death after first trying to ram her car through a White House barricade then leading Capitol police on a car chase, has garnered a conspiracy theory. I know that’s hard to believe. The site reporting this Obama scandal, inadvertently used a satirical site as their source, so it’s sort of like 4Chan meets Fox News. They post on the New World Order and Alternative news, which must be code talk for making stuff up.

Yes, I really am going to open a can of stupid on you.

Carey

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

WhatDoesItMean.com writes, “A new report circulating in the Kremlin today prepared by the Main Intelligence Directorate (GRU) claims that the unarmed 34-year-old woman named Miriam Carey who was gunned down last Thursday (3 October) in Washington D.C. was, in fact, “deliberately targeted” by an elite hit-squad under orders to assassinate what Russian intelligence officials say was the mother of President Barack Obama’s “love child.”

According to the conspiracy theory,  “Obama first met Ms Carey on 18 May 2011 when he traveled to New London, Connecticut to address the graduating class of the US Coast Guard Academy.”

Obama’s delay for making this address was merely a ruse.

The President was, instead, having a “significant” problem, the source reports, after having lodged a portion of a pistachio nut shell into one of his back molars.

An approved”  (their emphasis) local dentist was to meet the President upon his plane landing.

The dental assistant for  Dr. Evans “struck up an almost immediate friendship with Obama.”

GRU analysts in this report, however, state that Ms Carey’s absence from work was “directly related” to an affair she had begun with Obama in 2011 and which culminated in a girl child being born in August 2012, and which it appears the President attempted to have her abort, but which Ms Carey refused to do because of her Christian beliefs.

The source explains, “GRU signal intelligence analysts (SIGNIT) who were monitoring CIA-NSA-FBI encrypted electronic communication traffic in Washington D.C. on 3 October observed the exact same “encrypted electronic signature” used by the elite hit squad that attacked the US Navy Yard on 16 September, had assassinated the award winning American journalist Michael Hastings on 18 June, and on 25 June attacked the Los Angeles Police detectives investigation Hastings assassination.”

The report continues, suggesting that Carey was lured  to Washington D.C. under the pretext that Obama wanted to see his new baby daughter. But really, what Obama had planned was to have her assassinated by his elite hit squad, because why not. And so he had her put to death.

Wait, this is a two-for-two kind of deal.

They further note, “As to why Obama would engage himself in dangerous affairs in the first place, this report bizarrely concludes, is the growing evidence that his wife, and First Lady, Michelle Obama, was born Michael LaVaughn Robinson in Chicago, Illinois on 17 January 1964. He was the second son born to Fraser Robinson III, a well known cocaine dealer and union thug for Crime Lord-Mayor Richard J. Daley, and Marian Shields Robinson, a transient street prostitute who was diagnosed with the HIV virus in 1998.”

Did you catch that? The first Lady is a dude. Until she of course, had a sex change. They conclude that Malia and Sasha are in fact, adopted.

The site’s allegation (their source) that Mrs. Obama was born a man, was actually from Christwire, a satirical site.

Here ya’ go. You’ll be needing this:

aspirin

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

H/T: My pals at Kick Butt Liberals with thanks! Love you guys:-)

  • tiredoftea

    Wow! This makes Alex Jones seem sane!

    • Jeanne173

      Alex Jones is most likely banging his head on a wall because he didn’t think of this first.

      • alan carter

        He got scooped! hahaha

  • rjcarter

    Wait… you mean used-to-be-dudes can’t produce offspring once they change teams?

    Mind. Blown.

    • o0Nighthawk0o

      But they are still required to carry maternity and newborn care on their insurance.

  • mrsgunka

    This will be the lead-in talking point on Fox News tomorrow! Now we know where they get their intel!

  • morgan520

    One giant aspirin is not enough!!! And the sad thing is, there are those who will believe this crap!!!

    • http://FreakoutNation.com/ Anomaly 100

      We aim to please!

    • Shanasmiles

      My liver aches from the stupidity

      • http://FreakoutNation.com/ Anomaly 100

        Take your liver meds!

  • Linda1961

    People actually believe that crap? And they vote? No wonder this country is in trouble!

    • brickman

      Oh, and they also serve on juries. (((shudder)))

      Gracie

      • http://www.tumblr.com/blog/akinsc Carla Akins

        scariest thought in the world

      • Debby Berg

        You should have SEEN the members of the last two juries I sat on. I sat in the corner with my head in my hands praying my forehead wouldn’t cave in…….

        • Mars Man

          LOL

    • juicyfruityyy

      They are also elected officials!

    • Dave Lanson

      I’m just waiting for Alex Jones or World Net Daily to pick up this exciting scoop.

  • jdubhub68

    Hey, did Obama pay you off to make it sound like this isn’t a legit news story, full of truthiness and part of a nutritious, balanced breakfast? ;) That’s what the tinfoil hat crowd will claim when you point out the facts to them.

    • http://FreakoutNation.com/ Anomaly 100

      I was promised ‘free stuff’.

      • Debby Berg

        ROFLMAO

  • Darrell West

    If I was Miriam Carey I would sue these people for this enough is enough

    • Lilly Bushness

      Great idea but Miriam Carey won’t be suing anybody, she’s dead.

  • http://www.tumblr.com/blog/akinsc Carla Akins

    This can’t be true, they failed to identify the other shooter on the grassy knoll and the aliens held captive at area 52. Pssh.

  • Randy Hauser

    When will this be on FOX?

  • Joann Locascio

    I was just waiting for this to become an Obama thing. Something like she was his girlfriend or he was the baby’s daddy. Geez.

  • Joel Smith

    I got into an argument with some people on Facebook that insisted that Sandy Hook was a conspiracy orchestrated by the Obama Administration to push an anti gun agenda. Their evidence was that the Social Security Data Base had recorded Adam Lanza’s actual date of death as the day before the Sandy Hook shooting happened (that part is true, I looked it up). In their minds, this proved that Adam Lanza could not have done it because he was already dead. The smoking gun. So of course you have to conclude that the actual killing was instigated by the white house, and Lanza was a patsy to pin it on.

    I suggested that a more reasonable explanation might be that when Adam Lanza’s date of death was typed into the social security administrations records that there was a typo.
    They insisted that I was an idiot.

  • juicyfruityyy

    One of the good things about, Obamacare, is the mental health care that is provided.

    • Cosmic_Surfer

      The problem that remains is what it requires to institutionalize anyone – after Reagan “de-warehoused” “for their own good”…There are few real psych hospitals run by the taxpayers…Any good facilities are privately run and will still refuse to treat the poor, the chronically disabled and severe cases.

      They have to have the appearance of success and those groups have little or low rates of “success”…
      Take the lifelong psychosis away from a chronic psychotic and one ends up with suicide rates sky-rocketing. Insurance won’t pay once the psychosis is gone and one shows a level of functioning. Release a formerly chronic psychotic into society and they die (I have seen it up close and personal),
      Severe psychological disorders are survival mechanisms. That very psychosis is the only thing that keeps the person alive.

      ACA does not go far enough – it is the very privatization of all health care that is the real issue that still is not addressed

      • juicyfruityyy

        Mental Health Care is a passion of mine. I had worked in the area for years. I worked in-patient, out patient and in the homes. To be fair. Mental Health Care was never really provided for patients, prior to, Reagan. Just look at the war veterans. Some of them were my family. One of the Mental Health Facilities that I trained at did resemble, “One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest”.

        I do agree, that we have a problem with the privatization of health care. I was opposed to this. My voiced meant nothing. You should never profit off of someone’s bad health and give sub-standard care to keep them coming back. There are not many people working in the area because of lack of positions available. For some reason, people believe that all you do is sit down and talk to them and give a pill. Those professionals with a degree have sought work in other areas. Those you want to work in the area are discouraged because of lack of jobs in the area.

        ACA doesn’t go far but we have to start and get these individuals help. At some medical facilities they are doing mental health evaluations with medical exams. Have to credit the Case-Managers for this. If they are hospitalized for a medical condition we need to make sure that they are receiving follow-up treatment post-discharge. This is not happening. Some of the patients’ mental health is because of their physical problems and vice versa.

        There is also, the problem with the patient and family seeing to the treatments because of bad stigma, associated with the term mental health. We need to face this rising epidemic. People should not be shamed in receiving treatment.

        • Cosmic_Surfer

          I worked pre-Reagan and worked with war veterans and psychotic adolescents. PTSD was a known in the 70’s but the VA was not allowed to treat it openly since the government would not acknowledge the numbers coming back from VietNam..It took until DSM-3 in 1980 to get PTSD as a Psych disorder accepted by the state and feds as well as Insurance companies. They would not pay with a PTSD diagnosis.

          The DSM is not US – it is an international guide to diagnosis and treatment but if it ain’t in the DSM, it does not exist according to the scam called insurance.

          http://www.psychiatrictimes.com/articles/ptsd-has-unreliable-diagnostic-criteria

          I also had 3 patients commit suicide for the same reason I described. The standard of care for psychotics has been drug, shock and get them re-medicated until the next time. As one who tried desperately to get them treated with after-care after creating a communication with the non-psychotic buried deeply, I could not get anyone to assist them after release unless they were wealthy or could be placed in the community mental health centers in the area. If they were military or outside the local catchment, they were left to their families – most of whom dealt with mental health as.a weakness of soul and not a social reaction (me the social psychology freak).

          Under Carter (and I am a Carter era MH person) we were able to start aftercare, sheltered workshops, halfway houses and day care and get funding.

          Under Reagan, many of those died unless they were privatized and the families had huge resources to pay. It was the treatment for the wealthy.

          I ran a sheltered workshop in conjunction with OT for a little over a year; also assisted in opening a halfway house providing 30 beds for Native American men in rehab for drug and alcohol – we got contracts from telephone companies, manufacturers and companies outfitting vans and trucks for camping, and recreation in order to teach skills to long term and repetitive clients – stop the cycle of recidivism – Reagan dewarehoused those too.

          I use that story because I take exception to the idea that psych facilities were not much good before Reagan – it depended on the facility and the location – States had more control than the Fed at the time and the graft at the governor’s level played into the horrific conditions in many facilities – I give you Cunningham Youth Ranch – the owner, an ex-jock with political ties – bought a farm and started getting referrals of “miscreant youth”. Beatings, torture and abuse was rampant. After the 3rd death, the KBI finally was forced to investigate. Florence Crittendon, KC – pregnant adolescents forced to sleep in animal pens; forced into 10 hour bible reading marathoins, slave labor and isolated into solitary if they tried to leave. A nice cottage industry.

          Those were the 2 places that got me into working the system. by mid to late 70’s, we were cleaning out the systemic torture chambers and getting funds for state of the after care…That is what Reagan killed – when he tore out the solar panels, he tore the heart out of the momentum of mental health in this nation.

          The institutions that took a good idea of using trained techs as psych aides to fill the need for institutional care (a VietNam era, MASH concept utilized in the 70’s) and got rid of the cheap untrained orderlies were then, under Reagan, told to use them for their ancillary therapies as they fired professionals. Administrators trained in psych were replaced by 1st and 2nd yr nurses or residents or unlicensed physicians working to get their license in the US (I can’t count the number of immigrant physicians from OB/GYNs to Pediatrists who replaced psychiatrists, psychologists, mental health administrators, and trained psych nurses)

          And the religious fanatics were given the keys to the kingdom…

          8 years of working with pros around the nation (one of the psychiatrists with whom I worked helped to start the first responders psych team-now a part of FEMA- under Carter; the grandmothers of AT around the nation and two other countries and their student interns)

          I was in KS – and these days the jokes write themselves – but that is not the way it was then. We had issues…psychologists using their power over patients to rape them, psychiatrists using amytal to grope patients, medicaid and medicare fraud, the use of electroshock aversive therapy on gay men…But we were able to get it out of the systems relatively quickly.

          We started seeing the push of the neo-cons bedding the zealots in the late 70’s. I turned in the Baptist Preacher psychiatrist raping female patients under sodium amytal and the “psychologist” doing exorcisms on psychotics in 1978 but their practices came back in 1982 as did the psychologist ( a buddy of one of the Shah’s guards placed in KC to spy on Iranians) who used his psychologist’s couch to attack women and used electroshock on gay men.

          I walked away that year and never went back to treating anyone – killed my practice and left

          • juicyfruityyy

            Thanks for the information. RayGun did alot of damage. I would not argue with that. I still think that he was an awful President. I have never liked him.

            I understand the DSM; for what they were worth. Still too many misdiagnosis or wrong diagnosis. A lot of time is not being invested, to study the behavior. Normally,you see a pill given, to treat a symptom. People truly do not understand how to use the tool. And a one hour workshop isn’t sufficient.

            Unfortunately, the problems that existed yesterday are still present today. When you venture out in the public and into the homes; this is where you see the true failure in our Mental Health System. The family reaps alot of responsibility. Plus, Health Workers, also, put their lives on the line. I’ve had my share of shot guns to my head.

          • http://shadowsinwonderland.com/ kriselda gray

            Sorry to put this here, but I didn’t see any other way to contact you, and figured you’d be able to delete it from moderation so it wouldn’t actually interrupt the thread… at least I hope that’s the case :)

            . I posted a comment a bit ago, and accidentally hit send before I’d finished it. I was able to see it (and the note that it was awaiting moderation) so I went back into edit it so I could finish it. After I saved the edited and completed version, though, it initially showed up just fine.but then my browser crashed and when I returned to the page, I could no longer see it.

            I’m just wondeinrg if it was deleted or rejected, or if I just can’t see it because I left the page and its still awaiting moderation?

            Thanks!

    • Mars Man

      LOL that is a good thing,, ha ha

  • Dave Lanson

    Any minute now. The Mensa gurus at Fox have to make sure it’s untrue before airing the story.

  • NancyEH

    It is both amazing and frightening how people create conspiracies out of nothing and yet, when many of us complained that Bush’s weapons of mass destruction evidence was a conspiracy, we were called traitors.

    • Carol

      Remember Pres. Bush said Iraq moved the chemical weapons to Syria? Hmm, coincidence?? Where did chemical weapons kill their own people, Syria? Coincidence??

  • Magginkat

    OMG……….. how many Obama haters will read this and believe every word?

  • http://shadowsinwonderland.com/ kriselda gray

    Sorcha Faal strikes again!

  • http://www.exposingmilabs.blogspot.com/ Exposing Milabs

    If he did have an emergency dental appointment in 2011, it can be confirmed or not easily enough through the dentist she worked for.

  • Miss T

    Well, I wouldn’t go so far as to call you an idiot…. “gullible”, maybe. A person’s birth date and death date are crucial time frames in their life span. HUGELY important info man….. A typo in an official record….. Possible, I guess….. Just NOT probable. Besides, if you just pay a little closer attention to the things going on around you….. the things that are changing mostly… You might just start to see the plot unfold yourself.

  • http://www.tumblr.com/blog/akinsc Carla Akins

    After 10 years at the IRS, trust me – there are tons of errors in official documents.