Here we go with that ‘small government’ stuff Republicans keep telling us about. Montana Republican state Rep. David Moore wants to save America by banning yoga pants.
He can have my yoga pants when he pries them from my cold, dead hips.
Come and take them.
Mother Jones reports:
Moore, who is upset that group of naked bicyclists pedaled through Missoula last year, decided that what his state really needs right now is tighter regulations on trousers. His proposed bill, HB 365, would outlaw not just nudity, but also “any device, costume, or covering that gives the appearance of or simulates the genitals, pubic hair, anus region, or pubic hair region.” Per the Billings Gazette:
The Republican from Missoula said tight-fitting beige clothing could be considered indecent exposure under his proposal.
“Yoga pants should be illegal in public anyway,” Moore said after the hearing.
Moore said he wouldn’t have a problem with people being arrested for wearing provocative clothing but that he’d trust law enforcement officials to use their discretion. He couldn’t be sure whether police would act on that provision or if Montana residents would challenge it.
“I don’t have a crystal ball,” Moore said.
The Billings Gazette reports:
Rep. Virginia Court, D-Billings, said she is concerned that the provision prohibiting garments showing the outline or appearance of a woman’s nipple unfairly targets women. “I think you are kind of being a little prejudiced against women,” Court said.
Currently, a person convicted of indecent exposure three times could be sentenced to life in jail and up to $10,000. In an effort to promote enforcement of the law, Moore said, the bill lessens that sentencing to not more than five years in jail and $5,000.
A first offense for violating Montana’s indecent exposure law carries a fine of no more than $500 and six months in jail. A second offense carries up to $1,000 or one year in jail. Those punishments are unchanged in Moore’s bill.
This freedom loving Republican also believes Speedo-style swim briefs should be illegal in public, according to the Great Falls Tribune.
While we should certainly mock men who wear speedos, it’s their choice to look ridiculous. He’s also not fond of tight-fitting beige clothing.
I wonder what he thinks of Open Carry groups marching around with their penis extensions strapped to their backs? I’m sure he’s totally cool with that.
How about we don’t allow dicks to serve in public office instead? I find that obscene. Maybe we should all go to Montana wearing saggy pants. I’m sure he’d like that.
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