Raving Conspiracy Nut Alex Jones Loses Custody Of His Children

Alex Jones claims to have received White House press credentials

After deliberating for more than nine hours at the end of a ten-day trial, an Austin, Texas jury decided that hatemongering podcaster Alex Jones should no longer have primary custody of his three children.

Kelly Jones was awarded joint custody with the right to decide where her children will live. “I’m so blessed to have such a wonderful support system, such a wonderful family, and friends who stood beside me through all this,” she said following the verdict.

“I just pray that from what’s happened to my family that people can really understand what parental alienation syndrome is and get an awareness about it, ’cause we could stop this from happening in future.”

According to BuzzFeed reporter Charlie Warzel, Alex Jones did not react to the defeat and left immediately after the jury’s verdict was announced.

On Alex Jones’ side, his lawyers portrayed his ex-wife as emotionally unstable and quick to wrongly accuse the Texas family court system of deep corruption against her. Conversely, Kelly Jones’ lawyers made the case that Alex Jones was a “master manipulator” who’d alienated the children against her.

“Mr. Jones is like a cult leader,” attorney Hoffman told the jury. “And we’ve seen the horrific damage cult leaders do to their followers.”

Hoffman argued that the trial focused unjustly on the faults of Kelly Jones, allowing Alex to fly under the radar. “Is it Mr. Jones’ celebrity or his vast wealth that’s allowed him to escape detection? Nobody can stop this man,” he said to the jury, allowing the words to hang in the air for dramatic effect. “Except for you.”

To prevent the trial from becoming a referendum on his bizarre webcasts, Judge Orlinda Naranjo excluded video clips of Alex Jones making “political” statements. The jury was only allowed to see one brief clip of him intoxicated while ‘on air.’

Perversely, his attorneys argued that Alex Jones is merely a “performance artist” and tried to frame Kelly Jones as the conspiracy fantasist.

In the course of the trial, Alex Jones was revealed to suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder and sometimes removes his clothing in the middle of marital counseling sessions. Jurors also heard about a March deposition in which he forgot the names of his children’s teachers and tried to blame the memory lapse on having a large bowl of chili for lunch.

Asked about smoking marijuana on camera, Jones told the court that he was testing it every year because THC levels had become “too strong” at the behest of billionaire philanthropist George Soros.

But it wasn’t just his odd behavior that swayed the jury. In what may have been the most damaging moment, Jones also admitted to cheating on his new wife.

The podcaster’s legal woes are just beginning. Chobani yogurt filed a lawsuit in Idaho this week claiming that Jones’s website InfoWars defamed the company. Comet Pizza, the Washington, DC restaurant that has come under siege by gullible fans of Jones, is reportedly considering legal action over his role in the deranged “pizzagate” hoax.

BuzzFeed’s Warzel recorded video of Kelly Jones after the verdict.


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